Seeing the small moments in a sea of chaos




There are many sayings to make yourself or someone else feel better when life is turned upside down. When life gives you lemons, it will make you stronger, you will be a better person, etc, etc, etc. While these platitudes may try to make us feel better, those simple words cannot bring a sense of calm or peace. They are simply words. Still what is a person to do?

Right now our family is preparing for a move. New job, new home, new life. Exciting - right? Scary - right? Chaos - you better believe it. While there are moments of fun, joy and excitement, the downside is trying to sell a house. Anyone who has been through this endeavor will tell you that fun is not the word to describe it. The disappointment, rejection, waiting are all adjectives that add to the emotional roller coaster of the big life change. 

I ask myself everyday, why doesn't someone like the house where I've raised my kids for years? How can no one see value in my home that I cherish? How can the light color blue of my bedroom be so off-putting that a potential buyer won't make an offer? (does that mean that I have to paint, again?) The ups, downs and waiting is driving me to my brink. 

Yesterday, as I waited patiently, anxiously and eventually for my phone to buzz with a showing request (none came by the way), I had a moment. No, it wasn't an epiphany or some great breakthrough. I just realized that I have to find the little moments of happiness. It won't be a big thing, it may not be a even be an hour, but it will come. I happen to find it in a picture. 

Going through some photographs yesterday, I saw this one picture of a shell. The shell was crammed into a bigger rock. I don't know how or why I saw it on the beach. Everyone else had climbed a rock to look at the whales in the distance. But, I found this tiny, beautiful shell. I had a moment that was just mine and I took a breath. 

While this picture of the shell didn't wipe away the concerns that I have in my life right now, I did find a moment. There's no offer on my house. I didn't get any showings. But, I did take a moment to remember the good things. So, next time that I feel like the weight of everything is just too much, I will try to see the small moment in that sea of chaos that is part of life.


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